Wounds are WISDOM in the making & the main way these wounds come up to be seen, touched and healed then, is through relationships.
The ABANDONMENT wound surfaces in the feminine whenever there is disconnection or rejection from the masculine.
The INTIMACY wound surfaces in the masculine whenever he feels smothered, constrained or attacked from the feminine.
When the masculine rejects or ‘keeps love at arm’s-length’ he is potentially attacked (blamed and shamed) or smothered, so gets to feel his fear of failure and loss of freedom.
When the feminine becomes needy she is then potentially rejected, so gets to feel her fear of being unloved and abandonment / rejected. This goes around and around in circles. The more the feminine is rejected, the less desired she feels, and the needier she becomes. The needier she becomes, the more the masculine loses attraction and withdraws – and the cycle goes on.
When the feminine is being needy, she has abandoned herself (lost her healthy masculine presence) so becomes only one half of the whole.
When the masculine is pushing love away, he has stopped loving himself (not connecting with his own need for love) so becomes only one half of the whole.
The work of the feminine is to find her healthy masculine and come into awareness beyond the stories.
The work of the masculine is to find his healthy feminine and come into his emotional body beyond the stories.
The path of the masculine is to keep finding failure outwardly until he can fully ACCEPT himself inwardly, disarming fears of FAILURE & of ‘not being good enough’).
The path of the feminine is to keep seeking validation outwardly until she can fully EMBRACE herself inwardly, dissolving fears of being UNLOVED (or feelings of abandonment and/or rejection).
Sheetal R Ahuja