Relationships are often times considered as a “quick fix” to heal our core wounds typically abandonment & rejection.
Its a daunting task to unravel these old scars ourselves & the easiest way to ESCAPE this is “jumping into a relationship” with a hope/need & desire that
– My partner’s love will heal me & make me whole
– I will feel “worthy” by my partner’s presence
– I will be “at par” or “in vogue” with my social circle. Coz Relationships today are heavily focused on having a social media presence & approval from the world.
This being the foundation, what gets created is :-
– codependency
– deeping of the core wound
– feeling even more hurt & scattered
Relationships feel more of an obligation & unsigned contract where both parties have to please, comply & satisfy each other.
An important aspect that gets overlooked is that
YOUR PARTNER COMES WITH THEIR SHARE OF SHADOWS/BAGGAGES too.
We attract a partner who is exactly at the same level of our”spiritual evolution” & vibration.
So your unhealed/unprocessed emotions are hand-in glove with theirs.
If you are disconnected with self & unaccepting of your dismissed, disowned parts of your pysche, chances are, your partner will PROJECT that back at you manifold!
Humans are programmed to enter relationship for a “need”
Its a means to an end. It makes life “complete”
So needs could be sex, validation, approval, money, social status, spending time, etc
Depending on your “needs” you build a world together with your partner.
Here’s another dimension that might seem interesting.
– What if you FIRST MEET your needs yourself??
– What if you FIRST build “your world” in ways you have always desired & then invite a divine partnership?
– What if you ACCESS all parts of you that hurt, including meeting your own gulit, regret, blame & shame BEFORE you invite another on board??
What differentiates a relationship & an Ascended conscious connections is that
Two individuals unite NOT to heal each other but to HOLD space for each other to constantly grow & evolve.
And for this level of bandwidth to hold, embrace the partner’s shadows & vulnerabilities one will have to be at a reasonably integrated space of SELF ACCEPTANCE!
From this space its no longer a relationship but it becomes a portal to contribute to world at large.
A conscious couple has a gamut of gifts that can be contributed to the world!!
Its akin to having a party at home & the house being in mess. And expecting your guest to clean it up for you & with you.
Before you make a checklist of qualities you seeking in your partner,
– lets tick our own core wounds
– lets say a big yes to radical self acceptance
– lets stand up for self & meet our needs FIRST by ourself
– lets make peace with our parents first
– lets get into harmony with self
– lets ask “what contribution can my Ascended partnership be to this Planet???
Relationships for me have been my most challenging, painful components & yet at the same time have helped me RETURN to whom I belong first ——- MYSELF!!
Sheetal R Ahuja